As many, I had a very difficult time in school without much sympathy from others. I made average grades only because of the threat of being punished, or the disappointing look of my parents. After finishing high school, I did go to college and double majored in psychology and art. I finished school and went to work as a social worker, working with victims and families of sexual abuse. Realizing I couldn’t lean on the people around me anymore, I quit my job and became unemployed, driving my family into financial ruin. Of course, I always had an excuse for my failures, and tended to blame the people around me.
When it came time to take responsibility for my own actions, I bailed! I got out of social work for a few years and got my financial situation situated. Two years ago, I felt the need to go back to social work, and I was hired. Now I’m climbing the walls again and I can’t get it together. I enjoy what I do, but find it impossible to do it the way it needs to be done. The mountain of paper work and demands are too much! Again, I’m feeling like a failure! Diagnosed ADD gave me a reason for my distraction and I have felt some relief from knowing and medication…. but it’s not enough. I’m running out of the energy it takes to deal with this day to day, but I will go on.