In the second grade I found out that I had ADD. I am now 21 years old. From the time that I was put on meds my life seemed to be boring to me. In Junior high i quit taking them. I started to procrastinate at doing homework and my chores. My mom found out that I was not taking them and that I failing in school. She grounded me and made start to take my meds again. I started to and my grades improved. Then I started high school. Went off them again because I could not be me. When I was on them they made me depressed and still do. I wanted to kill myself because i did not think that I was good enough. My brother was a straight A student and knew what he wanted to when he grew up, and here i was the problem child.
I almost failed my freshman year in high school. I went back on the meds and kept going off them. I barley made it. When I was 20 years old i got my first job, and thought that i could control it. But found out that i could not. I was not doing a good job at work and was getting in wrecks cuz i was not pay attention. So back on the meds i went. I started to due better at work and was told that quit often. SO i went off them again.
Now I find myself in the situation that cuz i went off them again I will be losing my job because I can not stay on task with out them. I have had this all my life and never really knew anything about it. I am back on my meds and plan on staying on them this time. Its ok that I do not get to be me. But there will be times that I can be me just not when i am at work. I plan on buying a ADD planner to help me out with reminding me of stuff that needs to get done. I plan to do as much research on it as i can. I also plan on not think that it is such a bad thing to have. I have gotten a appt. with a ADD coach and am going to stick with it. I on longer what to be a burden because I have this. I want to start to live a normal life. This is just going to a part of it.
I read all the stories here and realize that there are a lot of people out there with this and that they are living normal life well as normal as one can get. I also realize that parts of these stories are just like my life.