Hey all,
My name is Martie, I’m sixteen and… Of coarse, Living with ADD. I have been on and off medication and in and out of counselor’s offices. I have been constantly told that I seam fine by teachers and school nurses. I know for a fact that I am not fine, I also know that my father is living with ADD. I have had my share of problems to face as well as you all have.
I guess I should start from the beginning, when I was younger (around 5 or 6), I was always being picked on by all the other kids in my school. Tired of being the center of all the laughs in school, I went to my best friend and counselor. I asked her why I was so different and she gave my a test on my IQ and emotional status. Needless to say I was exceptionally smart I just couldn’t get a handle on myself. Finally my Dad found out what was going on and went to my doctor.
The doctor put me on Ritalin. I do believe it was the worst stuff I ever took. I was never hungry unless the medication wore off, I felt sick alot, and I still wasn’t doing well in school.
After about a year, my dad talked to the doctor and took me off of it. Apparently, The Ritalin didn’t work like it was supposed to, or so I found out from a magazine a few weeks later. Since nothing seamed to be working, I told my dad that I could live without it. I was off my meds for about four years, then my grades began to fall. (Although, I understand math and have no problem with it, That was my down fall.)
My dad went back to the doctor and they thought Adderall would work better, so I tried it. I thought that it was worse than the Ritalin. I couldn’t sleep, I didn’t want to eat and within the first month I lost 27 pounds. I was tired, but was extremely hyper all the time. No one really could tell that something was wrong with me.
About two years ago, I went off my medication and my grades fell alittle but they were still in the B range. My grades were fine but my social life was pretty bad. I hated talking to my friends because any questions they asked just made me mad.
That summer was great and the following school year was so good. I had good grades, I met an awesome guy, and my social life was better than it ever had been. I felt like nothing could rain on my parade. That is, until six months later. All of a sudden, the love of my life told me that he didn’t want to have a relationship anymore. I told him that he could call me whenever he needed someone to talk to, which In my language meant, DON’T LEAVE ME!!!
Ever since he left, it was like I had to start all over. I had to gather up the pieces of my broken life and somehow put “me” back together. I have never really recovered, my grades are still poor and I’m just barely passing. I have been told that I have depression (which I don’t doubt), but I’m not really sure if that’s all.
I believe that being so attached to someone, made me realize what a normal life was like. Yes, my grades are F’s but I have now been able to realize that the ADD hasn’t been affecting me anymore. I was always so used to having such an abundance of energy, which I no longer have. I believe that an attachment like that shocked me back to “normal.” I hope that in the near future I can figure out what is really going on. Until then I would hope for your prayers and best wishes in my situation.
Thank you all for your time!
~Martie