Kristen’s Story

am 22 years old GIRL or well YOUNG ADULT and I have always known that I am very much different then others around me. I have recently studied psychology and when we came to the part about ADHD my life suddenly all made perfect sense. I haven’t gone to a doctor or some professional but I simply know there is no doubt. I can manage my messy life quite well I think ๐Ÿ™‚

But to my story then:
As a child I was extremely hyper. I got notes from teachers everyday for bad behavior such as constantly interrupting the teacher, not focusing, running around, disturbing other kids. I nearly had no sense of fear, always climbing on high places, like rooftops planning adventures,jumping down from second floor, the list is endless, basically getting in constant trouble without intending to – looking for that constant high (adrenaline) sensation.

I also had to be always in the center of everything (actually till the end of middle school and still in a more suppressed way now, I am trying) Always take the lead, my way or highway!

At that time no one knew in my country about ADHD so I was just considered a hyper troublesome kid.

Of course I couldn’t wait my turn in anything ๐Ÿ™‚ Rarely ever did my homework, just couldn’t concentrate and there was/is always million more important/interesting things to do. But still always passed with medium grades, unless the subject was killingly boring. My mum always called it my natural intelligence:)
Before becoming a teenager I was extremely good in lying and acting. I don’t know where I picked it up but did it all the time without much care.

In teenage years I developed a strong sense of guilt and very low self esteem, I am still very sensitive to criticism but have worked the self esteem part a bit more stable. Of course the mood swings really showed their face in teens and I just thought they would pass as a teenage thing does, but they are still here with me and I have grown used to them and know them and use them as inspiration in creativity(such as painting) and writing ( I am quite good at that)

I have so many daydreams all the time I lost the count. In late few years my memory has really started to give up on me. I forget so fast all the time, things I just agreed upon 5 minutes ago. Often I really cant recall periods of time in my life or like last Thursday, takes some effort ๐Ÿ™‚ But yeah the short term memory is well very short ๐Ÿ˜‰

My hyperactivity changed though nearly to opposite in high school. I become constantly tired and needed day time naps every day. I either have extremely lot of energy (very hyper) or none at all these days, the second part more often. The first when I get really exited on interested in something, like an energy rush

My room is a mess, but makes sense to me ๐Ÿ™‚ always misplace things or cant find them. I seem to place my keys and other things where ever they drop from my hand when my attention shifts to something else.

I space out often and daydream a lot when I am suppose to pay attention to a lecture. But I have discovered that with playing something in my hands or drawing on the corner of the paper I can actually focus on listening most of the time. (fixing all the typos here – I do them a lot)Sitting perfectly still and not hopping my leg or playing with something in my hand and paying attention is nearly impossible

My favorite thing is catching and understanding things fast and becoming good at them fast. Well because if I cant get “there” fast enough I simply loose interest unless its like dancing lesson or other sort of moving art or acing/drama – attention!!! which I love, well specially dancing ๐Ÿ™‚

In conclusion I don’t really feel the desire do treat all that (maybe except the memory problems, losing things and anxiety). I’ve grown to like that peculiarity of myself and I love to be different and weird and exiting ๐Ÿ™‚ So I don’t really consider drugs or medication but I guess it would help to talk to some therapist of them things in the brackets am not so fond of.

Thank you for your attention and good luck reading more and finding out about other stories. Its a great site here ๐Ÿ™‚ I hope my jumping style from topic to topic makes sense to all the ADDers. Since my mind is just working faster than I type and forgets and finds the ideas again later, some of them not:)