Tabby’s Story

First of all, you are all so amazing to me! To excel as many of you have, in a world where we ADD people are considered lazy and stupid, is a wonderful success!

I am a 23yo woman. I have been married to an incredible man for five years. He is the one that made me see that there is definitely something going on with me. For years, I thought I was just a daft person by nature. I had tons of creativity but also a lot of trouble getting it out. My favorite medium has always been writing. I have STARTED 4 different books, but can never finish. I get incredibly close and then *zap*, I stop.

As a child, I always had trouble in school. I was terrible in math and science, but quite good with english and lit. My report cards always had notes on them about how I needed to apply myself, how bright I was, and how much I talked. I was teased constantly by the other kids, and always and forever called stupid. My parents thought I was lazy, even when I tried to explain that the classes bored me. At the time, I had no clue what ADD was, or that apparently several people in my family have it.

The constant teasing from my peers, and the putdown from the women that raised me (my father was absent from my early childhood until my teens), led into a state of depression and anxiety. I had substance abuse issues, along with other things.

At 17, I met the man I would marry. I was able to put up a good, “put together” front until we got married. About 6 months into the marriage, the issues arose. The house would become a mess, I would forget important things, I was always tired since I would sleep every 36 hours or so, and every time he would ask for a reason for my behaviour, the answer was “I don’t know.”

He has always said “There is no such thing as ADD.” He even has a silly little acronym for ADHD. “Another darned hypochondriacs disease”. He doesn’t think that way now. He has seen it in action, and has also done lots of research on it, in an attempt to help me. We are both working together on this, because we know that if we don’t, it might cost us our marriage. It almost has several times.

I refuse to have children. I have a short fuse on top of it all, and I fear what it would be like to try to raise children. I know many of you have kids and it works out, but I just don’t think I could handle it. Is there anyone else that has been led to make this choice? I feel alone in this one.

I do not take any meds, as my substance abuse issues from my teens still haunt me. I have taken welbuterin, but could never get it to take full effect since I forgot to take it most of the time. If anyone else here deals with their ADD without meds, I would love to hear from you!